dearbaby: Natural Childbirth, Round Two. Preparing for Arlo. As I write this, I have 2 months and 19 days before my due date. (I just googled it) and we’re just beginning to really ramp up with all of our natural birth preparations. The good news is that I did a lot of the heavy lifting in figuring out what I wanted to do when I was pregnant with Everly, so it feels a lot like jumping back into a routine I’m already familiar with. Finding a midwife. I had my first appointment on Monday with a midwife at The Women’s Birth & Wellness Center in Chapel Hill. Sadly, this is the only free standing birth center in North Carolina. We’re fortunate that we only have to drive 40 minutes each way to get there - some women have to drive hours to have the opportunity to deliver their babies at this wonderful place. Fortunately, there are OBGYN practices across the state that do have midwives on staff, but we want to have a water birth this time and this is our only option for doing so unless we have a homebirth. We decided early on that I would start my care at a general OB practice and transfer to a midwife practice around 25 weeks - mainly due to the drive involved and the time I miss from work to go to every appointment (3hrs+ for every visit to Chapel Hill).  I started my early pre-natal care at a convenient, highly rated OBGYN in Raleigh, knowing I would not stay - but I went in with an open mind. My first appointment was at 13 weeks. I sat down to review everything with the head nurse who walked through their fees, a timeline for my appointments, etc. When she asked if I had any questions I said “I had a natural childbirth with my first, and intend to do so again this time. Does your office support women who want to avoid an epidural, prefer intermittent fetal monitoring and do not want an IV?”  She was quiet and then said “I’m not sure, I need to run that by one of our doctors.”  Surely I wasn’t the first woman to ever ask this?? - but she left the room and came back a few minutes later to tell me that they would support a natural childbirth plan as long as the baby wasn’t in danger (??) and I had to have an IV line put in no matter what. Over the weeks, as I met with the different OB’s on staff - I asked them all the same question. Each time I was met with responses that varied from “We’ll play it by ear when you get in there - anything can happen” to “We will work with you but there are a lot of risks involved that could harm your child, and I know you don’t want that”.  Had this been my only option for care, I would have argued. I would have stood my ground - but I knew that I was getting the heck out of there and so I bit my tongue knowing it wasn’t going to do me much good. I think the most disheartening thing was to think that this is what many women are being told when they ask their doctors about natural childbirth. They made it seem dangerous and unattainable when in fact, the complete opposite is true.  So fast forward to my visit at the Birth Center. The first thing I notice - there are toys and books in the waiting room!  This thrills me to no end because we very much believe that this should be a family affair and I always felt uncomfortable when Brent and I brought Everly to my previous provider’s appointments. We met our first midwife and she was wonderful. She spent almost 45 minutes talking with us, asking us about Everly’s birth, sharing with us all of the resources that are available, and listening to Arlo’s gorgeous heartbeat for as long as we wanted (and playing with Dovie in between all of it). While I paid for the appointment and scheduled my next, Brent headed down to the car with Everly to change her diaper. The minute I walked up he said to me “That’s our place!” and I agreed, feeling so happy to have found a practice as wonderful as the one I left in San Francisco. Birthing Options: I had a lot of interest in trying a waterbirth with Everly, but the hospital I delivered her in would only allow me to labor in water. My labor progressed so quickly that by the time they had the Aqua-doula tub set up and ready to go, I was already at 10 cms and wanting to push. Experiencing a waterbirth has been one of the things I’ve wanted most since that time.  The birth center features large, comfortable tubs in each birthing suite (as opposed to one that require complete set-up in our previous hospital) so all they have to do is fill them. I’m very, very excited about this.  I was told that I might want to go ahead and call in when we’re on the way so that they can set one up before we arrive considering how fast my last labor went. Several people have warned me of the “dangers” of waterbirths - but waterbirths are far less dangerous than the risks associated with bed births and c-sections. An Iowa State research study compared over 2,000 waterbirths to those of bed births. The results showed that episiotomy rates, tearing, and the need for pain medicine were all significantly higher in bed births vs. waterbirths. The study also concluded that waterbirths do not result in any higher risks to the mother or child than bedbirths when all of the same medical criteria are followed. (stats) Meanwhile, 1 in 3 women are receiving c-sections in this country with increased susceptibility to infections, blood loss, and much longer recovery times in the hospital. Again, I’m stating this not because I don’t support and value the need for cesearean sections or epidurals when they are necessary - but because when weighed against the risks of a natural birth in water - Brent and I have decided that using water as a pain coping mechanism vs. an epidural is a safer alternative. Doula’s Rock! I really believe they are the most wonderful, amazing people ever! For those not familiar with doulas, they act as birthing coaches and supporters during your labor. Doulas can have a supremely positive impact on a successful natural birth. Women who use doulas have 25% shorter labors, a 50% less chance of requiring a c-section, and a 60% reduction in epidural requests! (stats) After experiencing a delivery supported by a doula for myself, these statistics do not surprise me one bit! My doula in San Francisco, Lindsay, was just incredible! Because she had attended many births, she was able to help keep me centered and talk through what I was experiencing - and assuring me that was a normal part of the laboring process. She would come over to our house before Everly was born and we’d talk about what we wanted - she asked us questions about things we’d never considered - gave me tons of tips and tricks for healthy diets, good exercises, and massages that Brent could do to help me when I felt uncomfortable. She gave us books and materials and videos to watch as we prepared. At home and at the hospital, she was calm and knowledgeable and supported Brent in his role as much as she supported me.  Afterwards, she visited us in the hospital and at home - helping to answer questions about breastfeeding and my after-care.  I learned SO much from her!  This time, we’re really blessed that one of my dearest friends, Kate, is going to be our doula! She is still in the early stages of her doula training but has attended several births and is researching a career in midwifery! I’m honored that Kate is going to be a part of this experience. Her gentle nature and encouragement is going to be essential when the big day arrives. State of Mind: Hypno-babies! I really love this program. This was the most wonderful program to get me in the birthing baby state of mind with Everly. Utilizing this program gave me so much faith in my abilities and helped me cope with stress and anxiety better than anything else! I loved drifting off into a relaxed state during the hypnosis sessions in the weeks leading up to Everly’s delivery. I’m a little worried about finding the time to do the exercises this time but I’m hoping to do them every evening before bed, around 10pm.  I also plan to listen to the prompts continuously instead of starting and stopping like I did last time. I had a really hard time getting back into the mindset once I stopped between traveling from home to the hospital and my labor really intensified. I plan to download them onto our ipod and listen to them on the car ride to Chapel Hill in the hopes that I can maybe keep my internal focus a little longer. A lot of little stuff: Walking- Our office has these really cool treadmill workstations where I can hook up my laptop and walk while I work in the afternoons. I have committed to walking at work at least 3 days each week for at least 1 mile each time. Brent and Everly have promised to start doing a nightly walk around the neighborhood with  me now that the weather is warming up too! Kegels- Whenever I read this word, I start doing them. And now you’re doing them too, aren’t you!?!? Red Raspberry Leaf tea - this  tea is a safe, herbal remedy that helps tone the uterus in preparation for delivery. It’s available at most health food or organic grocery stores. I drank this stuff religiously with Everly and while I don’t have any proof or statistics around it, Chinese herbalist have been using it for centuries and it certainly can’t hurt! Birth Ball - I just popped my mine and had to order a new one. But I LOVE having a birth ball. Birth balls help encourage the correct positioning of your hips and back so that your baby will face Occipito-anterior (the correct position a baby should be turned for labor). I try to sit on it in the evenings to help with my posture and it just feels so good on my hips and joints.  It’s great for doing pregnancy related exercises and I was actually bouncing on mine and typing when my water broke with Everly! You can find some great information on utilizing a birth ball here. So there you go - the long winded version of what we’re doing to prepare. I know these posts can stir up controversy from folks when you start down the whole natural vs. medical birth debate.  I’m not here to sway any of you one way or the other, I just want to present the “why” behind the choices we’ve made for our family. One thing I know we can agree on is that we all aim for is a healthy baby delivery and a safe, comfortable mama. Bringing a new life into the world is a beautiful thing! Love, M This is such an amazing and inspiring post about natural birth. It makes me sad that natural childbirth is not even an option to most women, and especially women in Alabama where Midwifery is actually illegal. 

dearbaby:

Natural Childbirth, Round Two. Preparing for Arlo.

As I write this, I have 2 months and 19 days before my due date. (I just googled it) and we’re just beginning to really ramp up with all of our natural birth preparations. The good news is that I did a lot of the heavy lifting in figuring out what I wanted to do when I was pregnant with Everly, so it feels a lot like jumping back into a routine I’m already familiar with.

Finding a midwife. I had my first appointment on Monday with a midwife at The Women’s Birth & Wellness Center in Chapel Hill. Sadly, this is the only free standing birth center in North Carolina. We’re fortunate that we only have to drive 40 minutes each way to get there - some women have to drive hours to have the opportunity to deliver their babies at this wonderful place. Fortunately, there are OBGYN practices across the state that do have midwives on staff, but we want to have a water birth this time and this is our only option for doing so unless we have a homebirth. We decided early on that I would start my care at a general OB practice and transfer to a midwife practice around 25 weeks - mainly due to the drive involved and the time I miss from work to go to every appointment (3hrs+ for every visit to Chapel Hill). 

I started my early pre-natal care at a convenient, highly rated OBGYN in Raleigh, knowing I would not stay - but I went in with an open mind. My first appointment was at 13 weeks. I sat down to review everything with the head nurse who walked through their fees, a timeline for my appointments, etc. When she asked if I had any questions I said “I had a natural childbirth with my first, and intend to do so again this time. Does your office support women who want to avoid an epidural, prefer intermittent fetal monitoring and do not want an IV?”  She was quiet and then said “I’m not sure, I need to run that by one of our doctors.”  Surely I wasn’t the first woman to ever ask this?? - but she left the room and came back a few minutes later to tell me that they would support a natural childbirth plan as long as the baby wasn’t in danger (??) and I had to have an IV line put in no matter what.

Over the weeks, as I met with the different OB’s on staff - I asked them all the same question. Each time I was met with responses that varied from “We’ll play it by ear when you get in there - anything can happen” to “We will work with you but there are a lot of risks involved that could harm your child, and I know you don’t want that”.  Had this been my only option for care, I would have argued. I would have stood my ground - but I knew that I was getting the heck out of there and so I bit my tongue knowing it wasn’t going to do me much good. I think the most disheartening thing was to think that this is what many women are being told when they ask their doctors about natural childbirth. They made it seem dangerous and unattainable when in fact, the complete opposite is true. 

So fast forward to my visit at the Birth Center. The first thing I notice - there are toys and books in the waiting room!  This thrills me to no end because we very much believe that this should be a family affair and I always felt uncomfortable when Brent and I brought Everly to my previous provider’s appointments. We met our first midwife and she was wonderful. She spent almost 45 minutes talking with us, asking us about Everly’s birth, sharing with us all of the resources that are available, and listening to Arlo’s gorgeous heartbeat for as long as we wanted (and playing with Dovie in between all of it).

While I paid for the appointment and scheduled my next, Brent headed down to the car with Everly to change her diaper. The minute I walked up he said to me “That’s our place!” and I agreed, feeling so happy to have found a practice as wonderful as the one I left in San Francisco.

Birthing Options: I had a lot of interest in trying a waterbirth with Everly, but the hospital I delivered her in would only allow me to labor in water. My labor progressed so quickly that by the time they had the Aqua-doula tub set up and ready to go, I was already at 10 cms and wanting to push. Experiencing a waterbirth has been one of the things I’ve wanted most since that time.  The birth center features large, comfortable tubs in each birthing suite (as opposed to one that require complete set-up in our previous hospital) so all they have to do is fill them. I’m very, very excited about this.  I was told that I might want to go ahead and call in when we’re on the way so that they can set one up before we arrive considering how fast my last labor went.

Several people have warned me of the “dangers” of waterbirths - but waterbirths are far less dangerous than the risks associated with bed births and c-sections. An Iowa State research study compared over 2,000 waterbirths to those of bed births. The results showed that episiotomy rates, tearing, and the need for pain medicine were all significantly higher in bed births vs. waterbirths. The study also concluded that waterbirths do not result in any higher risks to the mother or child than bedbirths when all of the same medical criteria are followed. (stats) Meanwhile, 1 in 3 women are receiving c-sections in this country with increased susceptibility to infections, blood loss, and much longer recovery times in the hospital.

Again, I’m stating this not because I don’t support and value the need for cesearean sections or epidurals when they are necessary - but because when weighed against the risks of a natural birth in water - Brent and I have decided that using water as a pain coping mechanism vs. an epidural is a safer alternative.

Doula’s Rock! I really believe they are the most wonderful, amazing people ever! For those not familiar with doulas, they act as birthing coaches and supporters during your labor. Doulas can have a supremely positive impact on a successful natural birth. Women who use doulas have 25% shorter labors, a 50% less chance of requiring a c-section, and a 60% reduction in epidural requests! (stats) After experiencing a delivery supported by a doula for myself, these statistics do not surprise me one bit! My doula in San Francisco, Lindsay, was just incredible! Because she had attended many births, she was able to help keep me centered and talk through what I was experiencing - and assuring me that was a normal part of the laboring process. She would come over to our house before Everly was born and we’d talk about what we wanted - she asked us questions about things we’d never considered - gave me tons of tips and tricks for healthy diets, good exercises, and massages that Brent could do to help me when I felt uncomfortable. She gave us books and materials and videos to watch as we prepared. At home and at the hospital, she was calm and knowledgeable and supported Brent in his role as much as she supported me.  Afterwards, she visited us in the hospital and at home - helping to answer questions about breastfeeding and my after-care.  I learned SO much from her!  This time, we’re really blessed that one of my dearest friends, Kate, is going to be our doula! She is still in the early stages of her doula training but has attended several births and is researching a career in midwifery! I’m honored that Kate is going to be a part of this experience. Her gentle nature and encouragement is going to be essential when the big day arrives.

State of Mind: Hypno-babies! I really love this program. This was the most wonderful program to get me in the birthing baby state of mind with Everly. Utilizing this program gave me so much faith in my abilities and helped me cope with stress and anxiety better than anything else! I loved drifting off into a relaxed state during the hypnosis sessions in the weeks leading up to Everly’s delivery. I’m a little worried about finding the time to do the exercises this time but I’m hoping to do them every evening before bed, around 10pm.  I also plan to listen to the prompts continuously instead of starting and stopping like I did last time. I had a really hard time getting back into the mindset once I stopped between traveling from home to the hospital and my labor really intensified. I plan to download them onto our ipod and listen to them on the car ride to Chapel Hill in the hopes that I can maybe keep my internal focus a little longer.

A lot of little stuff:

Walking- Our office has these really cool treadmill workstations where I can hook up my laptop and walk while I work in the afternoons. I have committed to walking at work at least 3 days each week for at least 1 mile each time. Brent and Everly have promised to start doing a nightly walk around the neighborhood with  me now that the weather is warming up too!

Kegels- Whenever I read this word, I start doing them. And now you’re doing them too, aren’t you!?!?

Red Raspberry Leaf tea - this  tea is a safe, herbal remedy that helps tone the uterus in preparation for delivery. It’s available at most health food or organic grocery stores. I drank this stuff religiously with Everly and while I don’t have any proof or statistics around it, Chinese herbalist have been using it for centuries and it certainly can’t hurt!

Birth Ball - I just popped my mine and had to order a new one. But I LOVE having a birth ball. Birth balls help encourage the correct positioning of your hips and back so that your baby will face Occipito-anterior (the correct position a baby should be turned for labor). I try to sit on it in the evenings to help with my posture and it just feels so good on my hips and joints.  It’s great for doing pregnancy related exercises and I was actually bouncing on mine and typing when my water broke with Everly! You can find some great information on utilizing a birth ball here.

So there you go - the long winded version of what we’re doing to prepare. I know these posts can stir up controversy from folks when you start down the whole natural vs. medical birth debate.  I’m not here to sway any of you one way or the other, I just want to present the “why” behind the choices we’ve made for our family. One thing I know we can agree on is that we all aim for is a healthy baby delivery and a safe, comfortable mama.

Bringing a new life into the world is a beautiful thing!

Love,

M

This is such an amazing and inspiring post about natural birth. It makes me sad that natural childbirth is not even an option to most women, and especially women in Alabama where Midwifery is actually illegal. 

Tags: natural birth women midwifery